She swished in the wind. Swaying back and forth, front and back, taking in the rays of the sun. Swish… swish… whoosh… swish. A stronger wind blew, but she stood firm. Swish… swish… whoosh… whoosh. Nothing could scare or move her. She was firmly rooted; grounded in assurance that this too shall pass. Swish… whoosh… whoosh… whoosh… The sky was changing, the clear blue sky was turning dark, and the clouds began gathering quickly. Whoosh… whoosh… whoosh… whoosh…
The wind blew stronger and more determined to bring everything down. And as it blew she swayed to every blow and swung back again. Got hit from one end and got back again to the other. Birds in the air flew with speed in the direction of the wind, in large flocks as if a message had been sent out – it was time to get to safety; no use resisting the pressure of the wind instead go with it and spread the word. But she stood in her place, strong and tall, shaken but not defeated, raffled and bitten without losing her dignity.
A storm was fast approaching; I could see it from my seat by the window of my house. The clouds gathered and covered the sky, then the sun. It became dark and grey. And with a roaring rumble the rain came down furiously. Beating on everything; nothing was spared. I had made a cup of golden tea; that is a little milk, half a tea spoon of ginger, cocoa, turmeric and hot water. The weather being unpredictable as it had been in the last few days, it was advisable to fight away inflammation with turmeric in something hot.
I held onto my mug of tea for warmth and reached for a mini duvet (The cream one with purple flowers that my mum gave me) and covered myself. Then reached for the switch of a floor lamp next to me and turn the light on. I was home alone. The inside of my living room was the mirror opposite of what was going on outside. Everything was in its place; clean, dry and in order. With the light on, its warm glow filled the room and made it comfy, calm and safe – the feeling of home.
I looked at the time and it was 3:25PM, mid afternoon on a Sunday. This is my preferred time to be indoors, taking a break from the being on a schedule. I sip my tea and reflect on things; stuff on my mind. It continues to rain like mad outside. I take the last sip of my tea, put the mug on the table next to me and stretched out on the sofa, bring the mini duvet up to my chest and look up into the ceiling. Change – is on my mind.
Change sucks. That’s why we stay in bad relationships, eat at the same restaurants, and take the same path to work every day. Humans like comfort, even when that comfort is uncomfortable. We’re creatures of habit, and breaking habits causes everything from anxiety, to depression.
Making a change, even a necessary change, pushes you out of your comfort zone and into that awkward place that nobody likes called growth. But for the most part, humans don’t change until their discomfort in their current situation becomes greater than their fear of change. Growth is rarely linear and often requires a tipping point.
Often, we grow in waves, a cycle known as evolutionary catharsis. This is the repeated upheaval and cleansing of our lives. And, just like cleaning your closet, it gets messier before it gets clean. We are the evolutionary process itself, but our beliefs around what growth “should” look like is nothing more than our ego’s perception of our role in relation to our surroundings. Naturally, as we release old beliefs, our brains struggle to hold on to their current reality before new, truthful ideas emerge. And, like most things, it comes down to surrender. We must be willing to surrender what we are for what we can become. ~ Excerpt from Why We Stay In Crappy Situations by Amita Patel.
The rain quietens down and stops. The clouds thin out and give way to the sun. In less than an hour we have a bright clear afternoon again. I switch off the lamp light, seat up and look though the window; looking for her – my tree from my blog posts The Tree and A shift I see. Yes the same one. One and half month later and she still fascinate me. I stare at her as if I expected her to have fallen out of her place and washed away by the volatile winds and fuming rain. But no, a few twigs and leaves are scattered on the ground, she stands tall and proud, flowing gently as if dancing gracefully and whistling in the light wind as if humming to a lovely tune.
Change is coming, however in this moment I am encouraged by my tree. I draw strength from her. Change did not bring her down instead it made her stronger. She has remained in the same spot, never needing to go shopping for her great looks. A tree that looked pitiful, alone, neglected a few months ago, to one having branches heavy with strong green leaves that can withstand a storm. She stood in her place and trusted that her creator will take care of her in every season of time.
“Therefore I tell you, do not worry about your life, what you will eat or drink; or about your body, what you will wear. Is not life more than food, and the body more than clothes? Look at the birds of the air: They do not sow or reap or gather into barns — and yet your Heavenly Father feeds them. Are you not much more valuable than they?”Matthew6:25-26.